Can you imagine if that was the problem

Why do I talk back the voice just gets more persistent and persistent. I have no idea how the sound gets to my head all I know is I hear it. Maybe there are some big black panels at my neighbor’s place pointed at my head and some delusional operator plays real time sound to me. Boggles the mind. But if you remember back in Nowhere Near Perfect that book you read of mine without paying for I spoke about LRAD. I was positive someone at the top of a Muslim temple in Port Coquitlam projected “ I am GOD follow me ” or something to that effect. I know its possible and it did sound like it was emanating from inside my head. This just promotes bad behavior. I have read that talking to yourself as long as its positive is a great way of being healthy and making a best friend. I don’t know if I believe that’s healthy in fact I really wish I stopped doing it. I would rather meet someone in person rather than talk to the walls thinking I did.
Unfortunately I have even scared people on the other sides of walls in
slum apartments from the 40’s. You know those old apartments that
sound travels right down the entire hall and everyone can hear everyone. I guess having a woman over is out of the question since obviously everyone would know. Heaven forbid they be on the top floor and loud that’s enough to get me ejected for good. I feel that apartment really cost me some potential friendships. If you can hear someones thoughts theoretically and know they are thinking about something full of shit and speak at them too I think that’s annoying to them. Can you imagine if that was the problem. How do you handle that situation. I think if these people could just stop being full of shit they might of heard me less. You know you really would have to be full of shit to be annoyed by someone belittling your thoughts. Obviously again if that was possible GOD would have some serious explaining to do. It’s hard for me to even remember that apartment which I was evicted from. When I first got that place the walls cabinets and bathroom had a germ covered layer which seemed so thick you could of cut it with a knife. It took me a entire week to take straight bleach on a rag and disinfect the entire place. I was
terrified if I left that disgusting film it would of given me some kind of
bad sickness. The color of the walls lightened nearly 50 shades of gray
to a white color again. The bathroom was the worst. A tepid warm filthy black film covered the roof walls sink and mirror area. These clowns should of paid me to rent this place. After all I probably spent enough on bleach disinfecting it. They really were weird people in that complex too. They all seemed to dislike me the moment I entered. People just were impossible to get to know. I couldn’t really talk to anyone they all seemed strange somehow and above me. I couldn’t understand what really was going on. Out of all the 42 or so units there seemed to only be a handful of people that really lived there. The entire third level of the apartment seemed vacant. The names on the marquee outside the apartment seemed to change weekly but no one was moving in or out. I just didn’t get it. I got tired of this bullshit so I camped out on a weekday all night and day to see who the fuck works here. No offense but obviously I don’t work well at least in the Comox Valley, BC I am much to discriminated against for that to ever happen. It seemed that this place was just a place for some kind of illegal dare I say it activities. Was everyone in there a criminal. I just was so bothered camping out that not a fucking one person passed me. Again I waited all fucking day.
Nothing but one dude. And he seemed really pissed that I sat for hours in the dead spot of the security camera. It looked like he had a job though. Well at least had somewhere to go. Never two days in a row though heaven forbid. Lets not get crazy here. I just can’t speak to people anymore. I seem to think I know what they are thinking and right or wrong talk about what they are thinking about. Either I am right or so grossly wrong they are too busy laughing at me playing detective I can’t get a conversation going. Didn’t you work here, didn’t I see you there, didn’t I ruin every chance I have at not creeping you out.

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